Hortence Hwrites Her Histoire

Three coats of basil green paint later...

Ceiling: Painted
Trim: Painted
Frames, Shelves, and Mirror: Painted
Green Base Coat: Started

So, based on the first wall I've started, it's going to probably take a good 3 coats. Yipes!

Also, both cats managed (at different times) to get painty feet. I wish I'd taken a good picture of their cute pawprints before yelling at them and cleaning their very grumpy paws! You can sort of see it in one of these, but it was much cuter/more enraging when you can see the little trail of pawprints.

So now, I'm gonna take a break, let the trim dry a little more, and maybe start up again a little later. Tomorrow is the day of green!!!

Editor's Note: Ummm Ackshully, this was Phase 2! Duh! :)

Painting is hard, y'all!

:-/

So, here we are. It's Friday night, and I've begun "Operation Paint my Kitchen"!

The supplies have been purchsed, the walls have been spackled and sanded, and (I think most impressively) the furniture and everything else has been removed. With the exception of the kitchen table, because that is just too big, okay?

I'm typing this in front of the TV, listening to Ted Kennedy's wake, and getting ready to get up and paint the ceiling tonight! Wish me luck!

This apartment has had several rooms carefully repainted. The study has been transformed from a sea of "Wild Raisin" to a subtle mix of tan and brown. (Much more studious, I think!) The bedroom has transitioned from a dusty rose to a much classier, if not a little nautical blue. The bathroom has gone from a mix of aforementioned "Wild Raisin" and a limey, sherberty green, to a mix of yellow and grey. Much more relaxing, I think!

I feel very accomplished in having had a hand in the painting of these rooms, and so, with my future in this apartment sprawling before me with the promise of a new lease, I decided to paint the kitchen.

Now, the past paintings haven't been as well documented as I'd like. It's hard to brag about your achievements without a good and horrifying "before" shot to compare to the "after". So, this time around, I've decided to chronical the process!

Here goes! For your viewing pleasure, some "before" pictures:

Yesterday morning I woke up with the song, "You're the Best" stuck in my head (the one from It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, when Charlie and Dee learn to fight) and decided to treat myself to a morning download before shuffling off to work. It turns out, that you can't get this song unless you buy the whole soundtrack to the documentary "The King of Kong: A Fisftful of Quarters". I looked over the other tracks, and I'd seen the movie and liked it so I thought, "What the hay!" and bought it up.

As I got off the train downtown, and started heading to work, I got that very special Mary Tyler Moore feeling that a good tune and a Friday morning in the city really foster well. I was sort of bouncing down the street, bobbing my head, agreeing that I was "The Best" "Around" and that, in fact, "Nothing's gonna ever keep" me "down".

When I reached my building, the soundtrack shifted tones. You see, the movie chronicles one man's struggle to overcome the Donkey Kong champion, and all the nerdy politics that's involved in this. (It's really funny, too!) So, for one of the dramatic scenes, they (of course) played Night on Bald Mountain (But I think it's mislabeled because when I tried to find a clip of it it was different...) Anyway, so this song starts just as I'm entering my building, and it lined up perfectly with my commute up to the 9th floor.

The walk to the badge-swipe: A simple beat

The walk to the elevators: The beat picks up, and horns are introduced

Waiting for the elevators: More and more complexities are introduced, but the overall tone is calm

I get into the elevator: and the strings come on

And then there are a few cadances of building motion. On the start of each of these, we hit another floor. When I get to floor 9, the music just freaks out, and as I walk to my desk, all heck is breaking loose.

The moment I log into my computer, the song ends.

Was this a sign for my day? Perhaps.

TGIF, my friends...

03 In The Hall Of The Mountain King

I'm happy to be the first in the fam to announce that, for the first time in years, we're all finally together in blue states.

Ooooooooooooooooooobama!

:)

May the next 8 years be incredible, and filled with delicious apple pies.

Okay. So, Obama didn't vote for or against a ban on partial birth abortions. He didn't because there was no provision in this ban to provide an exception if the health of the mother's health was at risk. To which McCain responded to the effect that that was not a good enough reason to not vote down such a ban...

Ummm... So, McCain wants me to DIE if I end up in that situation? Because of my biology--because of my capability to bring a life into the world, I should be legally omitted from a medical procedure that could save my life if the worst case scenario presented itself. Nice. Great. Faaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaabulous.

Also--did anyone else notice McCain's impish grin and hectic scribbling throughout? The highlight of which was McCain's cartoonish reaction to the idea that Fox News disagreed with him? I wish I had been drinking for each of these--because I would be so happily hammered right now...

Also, Also--(And I really mean this with respect, but...) Why was McCain talking about autism in relation to Sarah Palin's youngest? Down's Syndrome and autism (as far as I know--and if you know different please let me know) are not the same illness. Promoting ignorance anyone? Yeah--a little bit.

When I went to the postbox this morning, I was delighted to receive a letter from a reader. An interested reader, no less!

S/he writes:

“Dear Hortence the Blogger,

“What do you think about the Ne Yo[sic] song that goes, "she walk like a boss, talk like a boss..."? I hear it on the radio all the time. He seems to be in favor of being bossed.

“http://www.elyricsworld.com/miss_independent_lyrics_ne-yo.html

“http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1WigZ1k4m9g

“—An Interested Reader”

First off, thanks for taking the time to write! Some may see letters to the editor as bossy readers trying to boss me into writing an entry about something they want to hear about instead of something I would naturally write about, thus bossing me though my whole ideal is to be the un-bossable! I don’t think this! I think it’s a good opportunity to discuss the plague of bossiness in our society (If I choose to respond—which I might not because I do think it’s only slightly bossy). So, keep them coming (or not, if you don’t want to—I’m not bossing!) good readers!

In response to your query, Interested, I had never heard or read the lyrics to this song before. I do not listen to the radio, since I don’t like being bossed to listen to this song or that song. I enjoy my iPod and my playlists that I have bossed to play me the songs I want to hear. However, on your suggestion fair reader, I have followed your web-links. And I must say, I like what I read/heard.

For those of you who have not yet followed the above links, and/or haven’t experienced this song elsewhere, allow me to give a brief synopsis. In Ne-Yo’s song, and subsequent Music Vidya, “Miss Independent”, Ne-Yo works in an office with many eager sluts. There is one woman, however, who is not thusly slutty. And this is because she is the boss. All of the other ladies in the office are eager to share paperwork with Ne-Yo, but the boss cuts him off in meetings and doesn’t care about his opinions. She also gives him extra work to do when he tries to complain. She does not take shit. And so therefore, all the other chicks in the vidya are just not as appealing to Mr. Yo. There is also a fair amount of choreographed dancing with briefcases, which is always appreciated. Her bossing is also shown through her impromptu meetings with Mr. Yo, in which she demonstrates that she has very shiny legs—which must be respected.

In short—it’s a love story… about bossing! What I just can’t wrap my mind around is why Mr. Yo loves to be bossed. Who likes to be bossed? Perhaps it’s a cautionary tale for youngsters—the moral of which would be “Beware empowered bossy people! For they are quite sexy, but then they will boss you!”

However, consider this, if you will—if the woman in this song wasn’t sexy to start with, I doubt he’d find the bossiness overwhelmingly sexy. Instead, I’d wager, that this woman would be the bane of his existence, if he was not able to sexify her in his mind at least. So, does this song essentially boil down to the fact that only really sexy people can be bossy and still attractive? I just don’t know! I think I broke something in my head thinking about it!

What I do know is that this song exemplifies the universal struggle we have when considering sexy bossy people. Mainly: that they are sexy, but also bossy. How can these polar opposites be reconciled peacefully? Can they? Are we facing certain bossy sexy anarchy here?

Thanks for the conundrum, Interested Reader! I’m sure I’ll get no sleep tonight!

-Hortence

I'm interested to hear people's opinions of the following story...

Lately, me and the Honey have been pinching the pennies. Takin' work to lunch is a great way to do this! So, every Sunday is now Pasta Night. We cook up a big pot of spaghetti and Turkey Meatballs, and dole out the leftovers into tupperware. Blammo! Honey's lunch for the week is all set! (Until he gets tired of pasta... We'll cross that bridge if/when we get to it...)

This afternoon, B decides to go to Boston Common to enjoy lunch outside while A) it's still nice out and B) he still works in an office right next to the common! He walks up the hill to the Soldiers and Sailors Monument, sits on a bench, and munches the delicious lunches.

B is not one to be wasteful, so he tries to scarf every last noodle in the tupperware that he packed before finally deciding that he packed this one too dense and has to abandon the rest. So, before he tosses it, he thinks to himself, "Hmmm, self, I wonder if I should toss this on the ground or in the trash, so that squirrels and birds and stuff can eat it you know?" and I think he probably heard my voice say, "On the ground? Pasta? That's disgusting!!" So, he tosses it in the open garbage can thinking that if animals want it, they could put in a little extra effort and go for it.

No sooner does he toss it than some aging hippie-dude speaks up, "Hey! What if a bird wanted to eat that?" to which Honey replies, "What?" The man then says, "Or a squirrel--you think you're gonna make him climb into that trash can?" At this point, I probably would've lost it, but Honey kept the cool and said, "I think they could get it if they really wanted it..." and tried to walk away. Then hippie-dude says, "How would you like it if some squirrel put your ass in a trash can?" Again, if this was me... I am pretty sure there would've been fighting, but Honey just gave the hippie-dude a strange look and started to pack up his stuff to leave (which is always the most sensible way to avoid brawls with strangers). All the while, the crazy hippie-dude rambles on about the environment and how young people have no respect blah blah blah. When Honey's ready to get back to work, he says, "Have a nice day!" to hippie-dude (how nice is that?!) to which hippie-dude replies, "Have a nice eternity. In HELL!"

Now, I ask you, who is in the right here? Apart from the fact that bossing someone in such an outright manner is probably never going to yeild positive results, who dumps pasta in a public park? Is it a compost heap? I think not! In fact, I'd wager that if B did dump his pasta there, there would've been some uppity-yuppity woman piping right in with her opinion that garbage belongs in the garbage can! Honestly, I know I would be upset if I saw someone dumping noodles on the grass.

What kinda squirrel eats spaghetti anyways?

What do you think, readers? Was B wrong to toss the pasta in the garbage? Was the hippie-dude wrong in hollering and cursing him to Hell for it? Or am I wrong for thinking that bossing belongs to those you love, not strange hippie-dudes that feed pasta to pigeons?

Editor's Note: Honey and B are the same person (my faboo BF Brandon) in case you didn't know!  :-o